The Buffalo Bills were scheduled to play a football game in Arlington, Texas against the Dallas Cowboys today. The defense hasn't shown up for that game yet, while the offense has made only a perfunctory appearance. Dallas leads the Bills 28-7 at the half, and the Bills are lucky it's that close.

Dallas has amassed 317 yards of total offense in the half, and have yet to punt the football. Tony Romo has carved the Bills up, completing 18-of-19 passes for 237 yards and three scores; Buffalo has put up no resistance whatsoever defending the pass. DeMarco Murray, meanwhile, has carried 11 times for 71 yards and a touchdown.

On the other side of the ball, Ryan Fitzpatrick is 10-of-14 passing, but has just 67 yards (and a short touchdown to David Nelson) on those completions. Fred Jackson has run the ball just four times (for 28 yards), Fitzpatrick has already been sacked once and hit routinely, and for the most part have been effectively bottled up.

Here's your thread for the second half. It can't get much uglier for this sad-sack version of the team we love. Right? Please?