"Back when I was playing, we used to take cabs to the game from the hotel when we traveled. One time, while we were playing the Patriots in Foxboro, a cabby almost spoiled our gameplan. The guy who picked up our quarterback, Joe Ferguson, was a huge Pats fan.

He recognized who he had in his cab, so instead of heading for Foxboro Stadium, he hijacked Joe and took him in the other direction. Joe had no reason to know the Boston area that well, and didn't realize that he was going the wrong way.

When he finally did realize what was going on, he jumped out of the cab and managed to get another one. This guy was more cooperative, and Joe got to the stadium in the nick of time. There were only 10 minutes left before kick off when he came running into our locker room screaming that he'd been kidnapped."

Let that be a lesson for you: never trust cabbies, unless it's this guy. Former Bills Pro Bowl guard and Hall of Fame member Joe DeLamielleure provides us with the material for the latest installment of Rumblings Book Review. Co-authored by Micheal Benson, Joe D's Tales From The Buffalo Bills follows Joe D from his early days at Michigan State, through his years with the Bills and finally ending with his trade to the Cleveland Browns. Joe doles out lots of love in this one, starting with some of the fellow rookies he came to the Bills with - guys like Merv Krakau, John Skorupan, and Joe Ferguson. He then talks about the fans of the Buffalo Bills and how great we are (which we of course know), and finally he talks an awful lot about "The Electric Company" and "The Juice" - and why not? That is a major part of Joe D's time with the Bills.

Joe DeLamielleure gives us a unique look into the life of an NFL player in the 1970s, detailing everything from the pitfalls of traveling in other cities (see above quote) to the different ways they would try to make extra spending cash between games and in the off season. He also seems to have a pretty good sense of humor, as there are plenty of comical stories to keep you amused.

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One of the rookies was a defensive lineman from Ohio State named Birtho Arnold. He weighed well over 300 pounds. We had to weigh him on the scale at the Griggs & Ball Feed Store because he was too heavy for our scales in the training room.

He was so fat; he had to roll out of bed onto the floor, and then push himself up. His thighs were so huge, they rubbed together and chafed when he ran.

One day Birtho came into the training room looking for something to put on the sores on the inside of his thighs.

I said, "What's the problem? Jock itch?" "No," he said. "Meat burns."

Tale Of The Tape, A History of the Buffalo Bills from the inside, by Eddie "Abe" Abramoski and Milt Northrop, is a fun read. "Abe" takes you on a ride down memory lane, starting with his early years when he would help out the Detroit Lions as a game day helper to the trainer (which is where he first met Buster Ramsey) to the founding of the Bills, and finally stopping at his retirement in 1997. You don't get a ton of on-field stories from Abe; instead, you get a great big helping of stuff like the above quote - but don't let that deter you. Abe gives some great insight into head coaches like Lou Saban and Buster Ramsey, as well as some guys who many Bills fans haven't heard that much about, like former equipment manager Tony Marchitte, and former team doctor Dr. Joe Godfrey.

More inside.

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More photos » by David Duprey - AP

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The Buffalo Bills made a rare national headline on March 7 when, desperate for help for an annually lackluster offense, the team signed ultra-productive and highly enigmatic wide receiver Terrell Owens.

Since the ink dried on Owens' one-year, $6.5 million deal, the vast majority of opinion surrounding Owens and his arrival in Buffalo has been either highly positive or overwhelmingly negative.  (Hence the term "polarizing" being such a snug fit for Owens and players like him.)  Tom Curran, who writes for NBC Sports, is definitely in the latter category, calling the Bills' signing of Owens one of the ten worst moves made this entire off-season.

Curran's rationale?  Well, it's not exactly ground-breaking, with terms such as "quarterback killer" and "me-first" making appearances (though we applaud "thumb-sucking" - it sounds so classy).  You'll read that in essentially any article on Owens, and the content is so run-of-the-mill at this point that we'll just watch you nod and move on to the next paragraph.

This is really why Curran doesn't like the move - aside from his obvious dislike of Owens.  (He did call him the "football devil," after all.  Pacman Jones is probably wondering what all of his gun-in-a-nightclub excursions really earned him.)

But the Buffalo Bills - trying to avoid going 7-9 for a fourth straight season - know that no postseason likely means their time is up. So they made a deal with the football devil that's known as T.O. Aside from their self-respect, what else did they have to lose?

Wait, does that mean the Bills have larger quantities of self-respect than I originally believed?  Being upbeat and confident is one thing, and going about the business in a professional manner is another.  But we're talking about a franchise that hasn't been to the playoffs in nine years, Mr. Curran.  It's us and the Lions in that department.  The Lions, Tom!

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Getty

View full size photo uploaded June 18, 2009

Following the 2006 season, the Buffalo Bills had two major defensive free agents that the team allowed to leave: cornerback Nate Clements, who signed a mega-deal in San Francisco, and middle linebacker London Fletcher, a productive veteran that the Bills allowed to walk to Washington.

Fletcher developed a reputation in Buffalo during his five-year stay as being a numbers machine, but not making many impact plays.  He was replaced early in the second round of the 2007 NFL Draft when the Bills traded up to land Penn State's Paul Posluszny.  "Poz" has only completed one full year of starting middle linebacker experience, but we're already starting to hear whispers from the fan base that the college legend is on his way to being an overrated pro.

Linebacker is a traditionally rich position in Bills lore.  To say the Bills have had a lot of good ones is an understatement.  But in recent seasons, as the Bills have transitioned from a 3-4 defensive look to a 4-3, and then further to a Cover 2, expectations for the middle linebacker position have reached bizarre heights - and as a result, Fletcher was run out of town, and we're already talking about Poz being overrated.  Is this fair?

Stats!
This quick look at statistics is not meant to be a comparison of Fletcher and Posluszny.  The two linebackers played in different schemes and had vastly different levels of experience during their times in Buffalo.  The only point I'm going to make here is that Fletcher's shortcomings were highly exaggerated, and Posluszny's detractors are thoroughly impatient.

Fletcher has two statistical categories here: one for his early years (this is the bottom row, and includes data from his time with the St. Louis Rams), and one from his first two seasons in Buffalo (the middle row; Fletcher was a four-year vet by that point in his career).  You can see that in terms of our favorite category - "big plays" - Fletcher holds a distinct advantage at both points in his career.  However, just like when we discuss Donte Whitner, fair excuse(s) can be offered.

Note the difference in playing time, first and foremost.  Fletcher entered the starting lineup for the Rams in 1999 - his second season in the league - during Kurt Warner's ascent to stardom.  In fact, the Rams won the Super Bowl in Fletcher's first season as a starter.  He played in 13 more games than Posluszny through his first two seasons, and clearly, he played on much better teams as well.  Poz has been in Buffalo for over two years now, but has just 19 games to show for it.

In terms of tackle production, there hasn't been much of a drop-off moving from Fletcher to Posluszny, particularly considering Fletcher only spent one season in Dick Jauron and Perry Fewell's Cover 2 scheme (not covered statistically here).  Why, then, does Fletcher dwarf Posluszny in the "important" categories?  If the pass rush is a factor when we evaluate Whitner, it most certainly pertains to Posluszny as well.

Pass rush discrepancies
Take a look at the team sack totals for these three two-year runs:

It seems pretty obvious that Fletcher was able to put up outstanding "big play" numbers early in his career because the Rams had perhaps the league's best pass rush during their Super Bowl days.  108 sacks in just 32 games is unfathomable in these parts.  Fletcher was also far more productive than Bills fans gave him credit for, particularly early in his Bills career, where the team put up 67 sacks in two seasons.  Posluszny's Bills clearly trail in that department in a major way.  Again, sacks aren't a true indicator of overall pass rushing prowess, but it's the only metric we've got to make the attempt.

So let's dispel two notions right off the bat: Fletcher wasn't nearly as bad as Bills fans made him out to be when the team let him go.  Why should size trump production?  Yet his height and weight was constantly referred to when he walked.  I, personally, grew so tired of the "he only makes tackles five yards downfield" argument that I was resigned to the fact that I'd eventually pull out all my hair - a feat I thankfully never achieved, given my perfect genetic breeding for baldness.  Fletch did just fine in Buffalo, and I doubt Bills fans would turn down his Bills stat line these days.

Meanwhile, we have already discussed whether or not Posluszny is overrated this off-season.  Like Whitner, Posluszny has been a bit disappointing to some early in his career - not due to his injury, but due to his lack of big plays.  Why should Posluszny get a pass while Fletcher (and Whitner) gets razzed for the same thing?  Truth is, he shouldn't - and that's why we're having the "overrated or not" discussions this early in Posluszny's career.  Like Whitner, however, Posluszny has a great opportunity to improve and become the productive middle linebacker we've been thirsting for since... well, London Fletcher.

In a nutshell: I believe that there is a strange aura surrounding the middle linebacker position in Buffalo, particularly in terms of Bills fans' expectations for players manning the position.  Fletcher wasn't missed by many (not when he left, at least), but he was an incredibly productive player in Buffalo.  Now people are gearing up to pounce on Posluszny after one full year of starting experience and little help from his pass rush.  I'm not saying Posluszny should get a free pass, much like I've been saying Whitner shouldn't get one, either.  My question to you this morning, Rumblers: are expectations for middle linebackers overblown in Buffalo?

More photos » by David Duprey - AP

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Buffalo Bills fans are worry warts.  In a city that has not won a professional championship in any major professional sport since 1965 - but has come agonizingly close on several occasions - there's a tendency to feel a little jinxed.  That feeling intensifies under the realization that the oh-so-close moments have been very few and far between up here.

So, naturally, hardcore fans of any Buffalo sports team - the Bills in particular - tend to pore over rosters, coaches, trends, and anything else that can tangibly (when we're lucky) get our hands on to find the weakness.  The one spot that we can point to to destroy any and all positive feelings engendered by off-season moves and other pertinent exciting developments.  Don't blame us.  It's genetic.

Naturally, with so much time to kill before Bills training camp opens on July 25 - and with a full month under our belts post-draft to let the splashy signings and draft picks' hypnotic effects wear off completely - it's time to commence our favorite pasttime.  (To those of you who make this a year-round endeavor - kudos.  Your wills are steely.)  We'll open the mini-series with a poll: which Bills entity do you see as the biggest potential stumbling block to a successful 2009 season? Your candidates...

Trent Edwards.  Young quarterbacks are always worrisome, mostly because they're always streaky and inconsistent.  Buffalo, to their credit, took major steps toward improving the talent around its third-year starting quarterback, particularly at the skill positions.  But it's not exactly a secret that at the game's most important position, Edwards needs to make strides if the Bills hope to do likewise in the standings.

Turk Schonert.  Taking over for former coordinator Steve Fairchild (known as SF-M in these parts) last season, Schonert guided his offense up the standings, but still struggled mightily in his rookie season as an NFL play-caller.  He flashed brilliance calling plays at times; other times, he was as predictable as a J.P. Losman sack.  Just like Edwards, Schonert needs to take some strides.  The no-huddle offense could help him immensely in that area.

The offensive line.  Jason Peters was traded.  Derrick Dockery was unceremoniously released.  Duke Preston and Melvin Fowler? "Departed as free agents."  Langston Walker is the new left tackle, and college tackle/pro guard Brad Butler is now manning the right side.  Three new players - Geoff Hangartner, Eric Wood and Andy Levitre - will take over blocking duties against the division's excellent 3-4 nose tackles.  Change doesn't always have to be good...

The pass rush.  It's been bad.  For a while.  We can kick and scream about the lack of playmaking all we want, but the reality of the situation is that little is likely to change in that department until the pass rush improves.  Aaron Schobel?  We hope you're right in saying there's plenty left in your proverbial tank.  Aaron Maybin?  We hope one year of college and an additional 15 pounds is enough.

Dick Jauron.  Quick - name the most-used ace up the sleeve of "realistic" Bills fans all off-season.  Oh yeah, here it is: "Dick Jauron is still our coach!" To say that owner Ralph Wilson's decision to retain Jauron in December after a third straight 7-9 season was wildly unpopular is an understatement.  Jauron returns for a fourth season in Buffalo - a "make or break" season, without doubt.  No matter how good or bad the team is in 2009, every decision Jauron makes will be scrutinized to the fullest.

Terrell Owens.  Yeah, I know.  Owens has been nothing but excellent three months into his one-year deal with the Bills.  That's fantastic and all, but Owens has never blown up a locker room in three months, either - he's a patient man.  Seriously, though, let's not pretend to think that Owens has changed.  He hasn't.  Things could go either very well or very not well; the likelihood of finding a middle ground is small.  Owens was, and will remain, a gamble for this franchise.

"During that off-season, Jim (Kelly) lobbied hard for us to go to that offense full-time. His rationale in his meetings with Marv Levy and offensive coordinator Ted Marchibroda was simple but right on: "If it works, why would you do anything else? If they can't stop us, don't let us stop us. Let me do it, and let's see if they can stop us."

Little nuggets of insight into the Buffalo Bills teams of the late 1980s to mid-90s, like this quote about Kelly pushing for the no-huddle, is what I was really hoping to get inundated with when I read Steve Tasker's Tales from the Buffalo Bills. That wasn't really the case, however. Co-authored by Scott Pitoniak, the book is sort of a collection of Tasker's thoughts that have been grouped together by common theme. There are some really good quotes and stories that many Bills fans didn't know; if you are like me, however, there isn't much in this book that will make you say, "Wow, I never knew that!"

The book is broken up into nine segments, but that really could have been whittled down to three. The first part is really just Tasker talking about the front office personnel, and the players on the Bills in those days. Almost everyone is either the biggest, the nicest, the strongest, the smartest, the most athletic, or "all of the above" person that Steve has ever met. The second part is Tasker's memories of big games during his career. The Pro Bowls, the comeback, and of course, the Super Bowls. I was really hoping for his insight in this segment about plays or moments, or even something that one of the team leaders said to the other players that made a difference, but I never really got that kind of stuff. The third part really saved this book for me. Tasker tells of some famous pranks that took place, and talks about how players got their nicknames. His, for example, was "Seve." I won't ruin it and tell you how he got that nickname. There is some good stuff in this book; you just have to be patient.

Was it worth it?
The price on the cover for this book is U.S.$19.95/Canadian $24.95. (I thought that the U.S. dollar was worth less then the Canadian dollar, but oh well, that isn't my problem.) $19.95 is a pretty steep price for a book, especially one that is only 171 pages. There are some good classic photos, and as I said earlier, there are some good anecdotes about the team we all love, but not enough for my liking. Tales from the Bills is pretty easy reading. I doubt there are three straight pages of print - it is broken up quite a bit. If you can get your hands on this book for about $12 or less, put it in your bathroom and when you have a "moment," this book is a great time killer.  It is segmented enough that you won't get stuck on the bowl for so long that your legs go numb.

General Impressions
I would give Steve Tasker's Tales from the Buffalo Bills a solid C+. It was an easy read with some nice pictures. The price tag and the fact that it didn't overwhelm me with great inside stories from those Bills teams bring the grade down. It is a good book to read if you were too young to remember those teams or if you don't recall much from that time when it comes to the Bills. Worth the time, at the right price.

Bills RB Lynch getting heat for appealing suspension (photo source)

Buffalo Bills Pro Bowl running back Marshawn Lynch made headlines - in the "we don't want these headlines" way - this off-season when he was arrested on a firearm charge.  The negative continued when Lynch was sentenced to three years probation and 80 hours of community service.  It peaked when he was suspended for the first three games of the 2009 NFL season by league commissioner Roger Goodell.

Having spent just two seasons in the league, Lynch has quickly become a poster boy for bad off-field behavior.  In the off-season after his rookie year, Lynch was arrested after an alleged hit-and-run incident in downtown Buffalo.  He avoided league punishment at that time, but the way in which Lynch handled the situation led to months of bad press.

In two off-seasons, Lynch has quickly devolved from a fan favorite to a fan favorite with a growing rap sheet.  There's very little doubt that if Lynch were to find himself in a sticky legal situation again, his time in Buffalo would essentially be over - particularly after the Bills handed new contracts to productive rushers Fred Jackson and Dominic Rhodes this off-season.

Since the ultimate penalties for his second transgression was handed down, Lynch - who said all the right things in the immediate aftermath of the incident - has appealed his suspension in an effort to reduce the amount of games he'll miss.  (From everything we're hearing, the appeal is not likely to be successful.)  For some - most notably Ed Thompson of Scout.com - this appeal is viewed as the latest in a long line of bad decisions made by Lynch.

Just three months after his latest run-in with the law, Buffalo running back Marshawn Lynch has screwed up again.

Thompson sees the decision to appeal as a reneg on Lynch's part when it comes to the maturity he showed two months ago:

It was disappointing to learn that Lynch has appealed his three-game suspension for violating the league's personal conduct policy, despite his previous public statements that indicated he was serious about taking responsibility for past misjudgments and cleaning up his act.

Pardon my feeble intellect, but when did appealing a suspension become synonymous with attempting to skirt punishment?  Broncos WR Brandon Marshall had a series of issues with the law an off-season ago, including domestic violence and false imprisonment charges (he was arrested again this past March, FYI), yet his appeal - and subsequent reduction - registered nary a blip on the "this guy's a punk!" radar.

Thompson seems to be working under the assumption that Lynch's decision to appeal was his, and his alone.  The odds of that idea being true are slim.  The Buffalo Bills want Marshawn Lynch on the field, and there is a precedent for these types of suspensions - Lynch's first from the league - being reduced, as evidenced by Marshall.  Lynch has an obligation to his team to play as many games as possible; he therefore has an obligation to appeal the suspension.  Marshawn is doing what's best for his franchise - a failure to see that, with a dash of cynicism and a quick stir of the pot, seems to have formulated Thompson's opinion.

Instead, Thompson sees the appeal as a desperate attempt by Lynch to save his job:

But after the Bills added former Colts running back Dominic Rhodes to the roster in late April and the team followed that up by signing talented backup Fred Jackson to a four-year contract extension this week, Lynch's appeal begs the question of how sincere he really is about accepting responsibility for his off-the-field misjudgments.

Anyone paying the slightest bit of attention realizes that Lynch was going to appeal the suspension all along.  He knew he was going to get suspended in March; he was actually suspended on April 8.  The Bills signed Rhodes, a productive eight-year veteran, on April 17 - nine days after Lynch's suspension.  Jackson inked his four-year extension on May 13, a day prior to official word that Lynch had appealed.

So let me get this straight - Lynch is suddenly desperate to save his job because of the timing of his appeal?  I'll go ahead and disagree with that - anyone with the slightest clue knew that an appeal was coming in the early portions of March.  The argument that his appeal is an attempt to save his job is completely bogus, though not completely untrue - Lynch is most certainly in a free-for-all at the running back position.  Perhaps some on-field motivation will only serve to keep his mind on football when he's not in team facilities.

Lynch undoubtedly has a lot to prove, including that he is the long-term starter at running back in Buffalo.  He is fighting for his job, but not because of the recent signings - those merely add to the urgency.  There is no question that he has the most to prove off the field, as he's widely considered to be nothing but the best of team players on it.  Can Lynch keep his word and stay out of trouble in the off-season?  That is the big question - and a simple appeal of a suspension shouldn't impact one's prediction on how that question is answered.  It's the nature of the business - and Thompson should have realized it before calling Lynch out.

More photos » by Don Heupel - AP

This is what the airport looks like when I get off a plane, too. This picture of T.O. is here just because we can. (AP Photo/Don Heupel)

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It's been an unusually loud month of May for the Buffalo Bills.  Actual football news - rare for the month of May - has been rampant, from multiple legal issues to free agent visits to Terrell Owens' reality television show.  Now, the Bills' Organized Team Activities are set to begin today - and yes, Buffalo's prize new wideout is expected to be in attendance.

With that in mind, it's always fun to make our first guesses at a 53-man roster before the first full-team activities of the year.  At the very least, this exercise will open up some different discussion avenues than what we've had recently (with VH1, alcohol, and even alleged bizarre crimes making headlines).  Clearly, this insanely early guess is probably destined to be severely wrong come fourth months from now - but hey, it's May.

Clearly, some things might change.  Future free agent signings (Pisa Tinoisamoa, perhaps?) or trades (isn't Roscoe Parrish still on the block?) would alter this projection.  If things don't change, however, here's my best guess at what the Bills' opening day roster would look like:

Quarterbacks (3)
STARTER: Trent Edwards
BACKUPS: Ryan Fitzpatrick, Gibran Hamdan

Running Backs (4)
STARTER: Marshawn Lynch
BACKUPS: Fred Jackson, Dominic Rhodes, Corey McIntyre

Tight Ends (3)
STARTER: Derek Fine
BACKUPS: Derek Schouman, Shawn Nelson*

Wide Receivers (6)
STARTERS: Lee Evans, Terrell Owens
BACKUPS: Josh Reed, Roscoe Parrish, Steve Johnson, James Hardy

Offensive Tackles (4)
STARTERS: Langston Walker, Brad Butler
BACKUPS: Kirk Chambers, Demetrius Bell

Guards/Centers (4)
STARTERS: Andy Levitre*, Geoff Hangartner, Eric Wood*
BACKUP: Seth McKinney

Defensive Ends (5)
STARTERS: Aaron Schobel, Chris Kelsay
BACKUPS: Ryan Denney, Aaron Maybin*, Chris Ellis

Defensive Tackles (4)
STARTERS: Marcus Stroud, Kyle Williams
BACKUPS: Spencer Johnson, John McCargo

Outside Linebackers (5)
STARTERS: Kawika Mitchell, Pat Thomas
BACKUPS: Keith Ellison, Nic Harris*, Alvin Bowen

Inside Linebackers (2)
STARTER: Paul Posluszny
BACKUP: John DiGiorgio

Cornerbacks (5)
STARTERS: Terrence McGee, Leodis McKelvin
BACKUPS: Drayton Florence, Ashton Youboty, Reggie Corner

Safeties (5)
STARTERS: Donte Whitner, Bryan Scott
BACKUPS: Jairus Byrd*, George Wilson, John Wendling

Specialists (3)
Rian Lindell, Brian Moorman, Ryan Neill

Practice Squad (8)
RB Xavier Omon, WR C.J. Hawthorne, TE Jonathan Stupar, OT Joel Bell, OG Brandon Rodd, DT Ventrell Jenkins*, CB Cary Harris*, CB Ellis Lankster*

Notable "Cuts"
WR Justin Jenkins, OT Jonathan Scott, DE Copeland Bryan, DT Corey Mace, LB Blake Costanzo, LB Jon Corto, CB Dustin Fox, FS Ko Simpson

I feel quite certain that if this projection is universally accepted, Earth will explode - or something like that.  So if you've got a point of contention or would like to offer up an alternative look at things, the comments section is available.  Go!