clock menu more-arrow no yes

Filed under:

Top Ten Reasons T.O. is a No-Show

New, comments

If you buy something from an SB Nation link, Vox Media may earn a commission. See our ethics statement.

In true Letterman fashion, the Buffalo Rumblings community presents the TOP TEN REASONS T.O. IS A NO-SHOW!

#10.  T.O. is currently recovering from an emergency tonsillectomy after a rogue popcorn hull lodged itself in his throat.

#9.  T.O. still can't believe that he actually signed with the Bills.  He decided not to show up in case he dreamed the whole thing.

#8.  T.O. is currently finalizing plans to co-star with Jeff Garcia in a reality television show entitled 'Little T mocks a jobless former teammate'.  (Garcia: "Hey, it pays.")

#7.  T.O. is busy stealing all 'HARDY 81' jerseys from Buffalo-area merchandise stores and coloring out the name with a Sharpie he pulled out of his sock.

#6.  T.O. and Randy Moss are recuperating thumb injuries after having a 'txt war' over which receiver is the 'real 81'.

#5.  T.O. is making his way around the US auditioning blond celebrity girlfriends for Trent Edwards.

#4.  T.O. is currently working out with nearly half of Buffalo's roster in his driveway.  They can't imagine where the hell that Trent Edwards is, but boy, is that guy a bad teammate.

#3.  T.O. was under the impression that the Bills practiced once per year in Toronto.  Hearing news that Toronto now wants a second game, he stayed in Canada.  Just in case.

#2.  T.O. forgot to set the alarm in his hyperbaric chamber.

#1.  T.O. thought voluntary workouts were voluntary.